If you want to help your baby start falling asleep at bedtime without fussing but are questioning whether you feel comfortable with sleep training, the Pick Up, Put Down method may be for you. The gentle method of Pick Up, Put Down sleep training encourages lots of parental support to get your baby used to falling asleep independently – without excessive crying.
Here we’ll go over what is the Pick Up, Put Down method, how long Pick Up, Put Down takes to work, and how to know if Pick Up, Put Down is right for you.
Expert tip: Want to increase your chance of success with sleep training using Pick Up, Put Down? Then you must download the Smart Sleep Coach by Pampers™. We know firsthand how confusing and at times frustrating sleep training can be – and this app was built by pediatricians and pediatric sleep experts to step-by-step guide you through everything a baby needs to start falling asleep independently.
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What is the Pick Up, Put Down Method?
Pick Up, Put Down is a sleep training method where you put your baby in their crib at bedtime and if they fuss, you wait a specific interval of time before going in to pick them up to reassure them.
The Pick Up, Put Down method is one method of sleep training, also known as sleep coaching, which aligns your baby’s sleep schedule with their circadian rhythm and then helps your baby fall asleep without external support. With Pick Up, Pick Down, the goal is for your baby to fall asleep independently – and fall back asleep if they wake up in between sleep cycles without you needing to soothe them.
Being able to fall asleep independently is important because it helps your baby better manage stress, improves their sleep quality, and develops their independence.
How Does the Pick Up, Put Down Method Work?
Pick Up, Put Down fine tunes the fundamentals of sleep (when your baby sleeps and where your baby sleeps) and then helps them with how they fall asleep.
Newborns physically need support to fall asleep, such as feeding, rocking, shushing, and cuddling. However, as your baby gets older, they naturally can fall asleep on their own – they just may need some extra support to get comfortable with it.
The Pick Up, Put Down method uses a consistent approach to bedtime to help your baby wean off your support and get comfortable with falling asleep on their own. With this method they know you are nearby to reassure them and get used to falling asleep in their crib without being held, rocked, or fed.
Once they can fall asleep independently, your baby usually will default to it! Of course, with sleep regressions and other developmental milestones, your baby’s sleep may occasionally be disrupted. However, healthy sleep habits from Pick Up, Put Down are in place, your baby should have no problem getting back on track with sleep.
Steps for Pick Up, Put Down Method
The steps for Pick Up, Put Down method are mostly consistent, except for one step which changes as the nights go on.
Step-by-step instructions for Pick Up, Put Down night 1:
- Perform your bedtime routine – a consistent, calm set of actions you do every night before bed.
- Place your baby in bed when they’re sleepy, but still awake. Remember, you want your baby to fall asleep on their own, rather than in your arms.
- Say “good night” and leave the room confidently – you want your baby to know they are safe, and all is well.
- Step into the hall and listen.
- If your baby starts crying or fussy, set a timer for 1 minute. If your baby is still fussing or crying at that point, go in and pick them up to cuddle and reassure them.
- When your baby settles, but before they fall asleep, place them back in their crib and leave again.
- Repeat the process until your baby falls asleep.
Step-by-step instructions for Pick Up, Put Down night 2 and beyond:
For the second night of Pick Up, Put Down, you repeat the steps of night 1 of the Pick Up, Put Down method in the same way with once difference – you add 2 minutes to your wait period before re-entering your baby’s room if they protest.
On night 3, you add another 2 minutes. You keep adding 2 minutes to your wait period each night until your baby is falling asleep independently without you entering their room to pick them up.
By adding time to your “Wait time” each night, you’re giving your baby an opportunity to self-soothe and get used to falling asleep on their own.
How Long Do I Hold My Baby in Pick Up, Put Down Sleep Training?
Generally, you do not want to hold your baby until they fall asleep (unless they are newborn). This is a habit you are trying to break with Pick Up, Put Down.
Hold and reassure your baby just until they settle down or stop crying, but before they fall asleep. Then place them back in their crib drowsy, but awake, so they can fall asleep on their own.
We recommend holding your baby only until they stop crying. However, if your baby accidentally falls asleep in that period, place them back into their bed.
If your baby repeatedly falls asleep during the “pick up” part of Pick Up, Put Down, we recommend trying another method, such as the Chair Method. This will provide your baby with reassurance but removes the possibility that they will fall asleep in your arms.
How Long Does Pick Up, Put Down Take to Work?
The Pick Up, Put Down method can take a few weeks to work. This is because the Pick Up, Put Down method is a slower more gradual method of sleep training that includes a lot of parental involvement.
Because of your involvement in Pick Up, Put Down, your baby will take longer to get used to falling asleep independently – but with consistency, it can work!
If you are interested in a sleep training method that works faster than the Pick Up, Put Down method, review the other sleep training methods here.
Pick Up, Put Down method for naps
You can try to use the Pick Up, Put Down method for naps, but like with all sleep training methods, naps may be more difficult because your baby’s drive to sleep is lower.
How Do I Know if Pick Up, Put Down Method is Right for Me and My Baby?
There are different reasons for why the Pick Up, Put Down method may be right for you and your baby.
Age
Seep training including the Pick Up, Put Down method is most effective when you start at around 4 months. This is because at 4 months your baby’s circadian rhythm will beginto take shape. Any sleep training prior to this point won’t “stick.”
Babies at 4-months also start to understand patterns, a key element to the Pick Up, Put Down method. When you perform your bedtime routine every night, you’re building a healthy habit by cueing your baby to go to bed. This builds a healthy habit.
For example, Pick Up, Put Down will not be effective for a 2-month-old or a newborn. Focus instead on feeding and cuddling your baby as much as they need at that point. For older children, Pick Up, Put Down will work well – Pick Up, Put Down will work as well on a 9-month-old as it will on a 6-month-old.
In fact, you can sleep train any baby after 4 months – yes, you can even sleep train a toddler – it's never too late to sleep train.
Weight
Your baby should be 12 pounds before you try the Pick Up, Put Down method or any sleep training method. Always check with your pediatrician before attempting to sleep train with the Pick Up, Put Down method.
Sleeping Environment
A visual barrier between your baby’s sleep space and yours is ideal. If you choose to do the Pick Up, Put Down method while room sharing, you simply follow the same steps at the Pick Up, Put Down method. The hope is that when you’re ready for bed, your baby will ideally be fast asleep that they don’t even notice you return.
If you live in a studio, try stepping into your building’s hallway or the bathroom.
Parental Involvement
The Pick Up, Put Down method is a good option for parents that want to get their baby used to falling asleep independently without much crying. Pick Up, Put Down is one of the slower sleep training methods and requires a lot of consistency and patients from parents to be successful.
Speed
Pick Up, Put Down tends to take a few weeks on average to work because it takes longer for your baby to wean off your support if you are very involved in the sleep training process. If you are looking for a faster approach to your baby getting comfortable with falling asleep independently, Pick Up, Put Down may not be right for you.
Falling Asleep While Held
In Pick Up, Put Down, it’s recommended you hold your baby only until they settle. However, if your baby accidentally falls asleep in that period, place them back into their bed.
If your baby repeatedly falls asleep during the “pick up” part of Pick Up, Put Down, we recommend trying another method, such as the Chair Method. This will provide your baby with reassurance but removes the possibility they’ll fall asleep in your arms.
What if Pick Up, Put Down Doesn’t Work?
If the sleep training method of Pick Up, Put Down doesn’t work for you, take this free 3-minute quiz to get help finding a different sleep training method that may work better for your baby. For some babies, their parent constantly coming in and out of their room can be more disruptive or upsetting than helpful. They there may need an approach with less parental involvement than Pick Up, Put Down.
For other babies, they may consistently fall asleep during the “pick up” part of Pick Up, Put Down. Luckily there are other high parental involvement methods that prevent this possibility.
Final Thoughts
When it comes to sleep, every baby is different. While one baby may respond well to the Pick Up, Put Down sleep training method, another baby may need something else to help them be able to fall asleep independently.
Regardless of if you choose to sleep train your baby with Pick Up, Put Down method or not, if your baby is going to sleep at the time that aligns with their natural rhythm, has a consistent bedtime routine, and a soothing sleep environment, they may already be on their way to sleeping like a dream!
